Note: Due to a slight complication, the first
three sets of the Outtakes have...disappeared from the database. Fret not, dear readers, and take a look at the remaining
pieces until we get this problem sorted out. Thank you for your patience while we resolve this matter.
Yellow's Outtakes: Part 4
Take 1 *Bane getting hit by a truck, take one*
Deadfast: ACTION!!!!
*the
truck is coming along smoothly, unfortunately, Deadfast allowed the Ace Combat 5 studios that where filming next door to use
the airspace above his studio*
Voice on radio: TANK 8’S PARCHUTE WAS SHOT AWAY!!! IT’S IN FREE-FALL!!!!
*airborne
tank lands on top of Bane, squishing him and the truck before exploding*
D/F: CUT!!!
Take two
*this time,
the truck hits bane, but sends him flying into Yellow 13’s studio causing major panic, confusion, and laughter among
13’s cast and crew*
Yellow 13+ Deadfast: CUT!!!!!
Take three
*everything looks good, bane gets
hit by the truck, however, as revenge for the pervious take, Yellow 13 planted a small nuclear bomb on the truck causing it
to explode on impact.*
D/F: all right everyone, let’s take a five-minute break and Bane, get some rest, and possible
a full-body cast. We’ll bring in your stunt double.
Bane: NOW YOU GET THE STUNT DOUBLE!?!?!?!?!
D/F:
just be glad you HAVE a stunt double! Charley: can we get back to the script now!?
Take four
*this time,
a bomb (from the Ace Combat 5 bombers) falls on Bane’s stunt double*
D/F: CUT!!!!!
Take five
*everything
seems good until a PA announcement sounds*
PA: would the owner of a pink Overlord tank please move their vehicle, it
is parked on top of Yellow 13’s aircraft.
Yellow 13: (from the next studio) AH FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! MY PLANE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Directors
from every studio: CUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Yellow Outtakes: Part 5
Scene 1
(Bane is talking for a while, when all of a sudden, he stops and switches to a Cantonese
accent.)
Bane: this is bad! Is very, very bad! I cannot do this accent anymore! Get linguistics coach! Get linguistics
coach now! (Starts shouting in rapid Chinese and stomps off.)
Deadfast: CUT!
Scene two (Kerrigan’s death,
alternate ending!)
(Bane has just killed Kerrigan, he is very badly hurt and the floor is covered with a lot of fake
blood. He starts moving back to Charley in the dropship, when he starts slipping and falls down the elevator shaft.)
Bane:
AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(We hear a SPLAT as he hits the bottom.)
DF: (muttering) looks like
we need a new actor to play Bane I suppose… (Looks at cameraman) is that thing still on?! CUT!!!!
Alternate ending
to Bane 13
(Reece has evacuated the area, Zerg are swarming in on him, all of a sudden, a GLA Sneak Attack pops up
and an entire GLA army starts coming out of the ground)
Rocket Buggy #1: SEE!? I TLOD you we should have turned LEFT
at Albercaucy! (Change this to the RIGHT spelling, my spell checker isn’t helping. It’s the place Bugs Bunny always
said he should have turned left at)
Rocket Buggy #2: DON’T START THAT AGAIN!
(over at Yellow 13’s
studio)
Yellow 13: hey! Where did that sneak attack go?! (Y13’s phone rings, he picks it up)
Y13:
Da? Oh Comrade General! Good to hear from you again. What? Oh. Don’t bother, I’ll send a few SCUD missiles to
destroy those forces. (Externally loud shouting is heard) WELL, WHAT DO YOU SUGGEST THEN!? An airstrike? Fine. Stand by.
(back
at Deadfast’s studio, a squadron of MiGs are flying in.)
MiG #1: Tiger wing inbound! Target acquired!
MiG
#2: Tiger wing, ATTACK!!
(All MiGs launch there missiles)
MiG Squadron Leader: Tiger Leader reporting, target,
eliminated!
DF+ Y13: CUT!!!!
(Onboard the Protoss Carrier after Bane has been rescued)
Rekham: when do
we get to eat?! I’m STARVING! (Starts drooling)
(Yellow 13 walks in)
Yellow 13: hello Comrade. (Sees Rekham
drooling) hey, wait a minute! How can they drool without mouths?
DF: how should I know?! You’re writing this
thing!
Y13: I AM!? AH CRAP!!! (Pulls out a computer) let’s see, delete button…, delete button…
DF:
so don’t blame me for your inability to write a coherent story…
Y13: SHUT UP!!!
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